Archive for the ‘ WOO-HOO ’ Category

Well, another miracle was preformed while Mither was here to force me to accomplish things help me out.

Remember this?

Yeah. That was October 11.


The stupid door finally got repainted.

Took about 10 minutes and one sample sized paint can that cost $5.00.

No. I don’t know why it took me so long to do it, except to say I just couldn’t decide on a color. I love red, but the neighbors across the street have a red door and I didn’t want to be a copy cat.

Yet, I really do love mine, now.


I have to give Mither a lot of the credit. She pushed me into going ahead and doing it. OK, she stood over me until it was done. OKAY! She helped me!

Er, maybe I helped her, whatev.

I really like it.

Do you think it’s turquoise because we’re Messicans?

John says I’m “Mexican by injection”. 😉

Well, of course I didn’t forget that I was going to show you the upstairs bathroom! The Peace Corps, dear Mither, Kessa, and I are finished and there has been a HUGE improvement.
The gallon of paint was an extra Mither had from some project she was doing at her house. It was a color that the girls didn’t really like. Kind of a soft creamy yellow. It was also a high dollar Sherwin Williams paint, so we took it up to their mixologist and he fooled around with it until he came up with this shade. I call it Orange Sherbert. The girls liked it. And when you consider it was covering an 80’s wallpaper that made the paper in my bathroom look current, we were tickled pink.

It was BLACK METALLIC WITH DARK PURPLE… SWISHES. Some sort of horrible impressionistic thing gone terribly, terribly wrong.

It sucked every ounce of light out of those two tiny little rooms. I think we expanded the space by several thousand square feet. (My rough estimate.)

Here we are looking into the part where the tub is. That’s Henry on the wall. Why did they name the lizard a boy’s name for a girls bathroom?

I suppose the better question would be why is there a lizard in their bathroom?

What can I say? I felt a connection.

Henry’s closeup. I don’t want to freak you out by getting too close… he’s sticking his tongue out. He has a bit of the sass.

And, of course we have to have a shot of the pot. Note the Pretty Potty Picture!


This is a shelf adjacent to the wall Henry is on. The clock is an old one I hauled out of the closet and replaced a truly horrid large blue fish with a clock in it’s belly. Yes, just as tacky and juvenile as it sounds.

Here’s their new curtain for the shower. Actually it’s two curtain panels instead of a shower curtain. The old plastic liner is behind them and still hanging by the fish shower curtain rings… need to replace those.

That is as far away as I could get to take the picture. We either need larger bathrooms or I need a better camera.

Well, there you go! You have been witness to another HalfAsstic makeover.

Next? I paint the utility room.


First off, I actually did repaint both bathrooms. OK, right that only took a couple of days and Mither was down here helping. BUT, both bathrooms were in such disrepair I had to house a lot of peace corps people in order to carry out the make over. Yeah. That’ll be a good deal of my excuse right there. Cause I couldn’t just kick them out as soon as they painted my bathrooms! I mean what kind of jerk would do that? They were going to deploy to…. Bosnia in a week, so I let all of them hang here until time to leave.

How many? Oh.

Uuuuh, lets say 30. Yeah, that sounds good.

Are you having a hard time swallowing this?

What I need here is a touch of evidence. Here are some bathroom pics!

Behold, BEFORE! Go ahead, click on it and make it BIG!

Master bathroom 80's wallpaper BEFORE the paint job. NOW you see why The Peace Corps was needed.


Now stop that! I know you can control your gag reflex better than that! You’re being a sissy! Only a few of those Peace Corps folks tossed their cookies. And there were 45 of them staying here, remember!

Allrightythen, moving right along. I’m guessing you are  now wanting some eye relief. Let’s try showing some improvement, but not quite done.

This is the loverly Kessa. She was a tad upset with me cause she didn't have any make up on. I know... I can be decked out to the nines and sporting a tiara and not come close to looking like that.

SEE! Isn’t it a beautiful shade of blue/teal or whatever it is? Talk about “lighten and brighten”! That’s what we did!

Here's the mess aaaaall over the counter. There is so much mess you probably can't even see the Peace Corps workers in there doing their thing.

Here's Mither bent over painting the wall behind the counter. I realize you can't see that much of her, (go with me, here), but she's peeking out between that bucket of joint compound and blue plastic cup of paint.

Here's a close up of my new shower curtain. I got it for six bucks at a garage sale and so the bathroom color was picked around it. SCORE!

This is a really great shot except that the paint is so totally NOT that color. I really did have a hard time getting pics that represent the shade of blue/aqua/turquoise/greenishblue...

See what I mean? The paint in the potty room is the exact same as the paint in the rest of the bathroom. However, I can point out here that the far wall in the potty room does look more like the actual color. I don't know why it makes it such a baby blue in the foreground.


Here we are, still needing bath mats down and towels, but doesn’t it look fresh? You have no idea how much brighter it is in there!

Doesn't this long piece of ribbon look pretty with my shower curtain? I wish I could figure out something to do with it in here.

It's hard to stand where I can get a good shot. Here is a look at the mirrored side, so you can see the reflection of the other.

Now, this has been so long and I have taken so much time to do it that the girls bathroom, upstairs, is going to have to be another post… I have to go… I am a volunteer firefighter and there is a raging skyscraper fire in downtown Houston that I am going to be airlifted to. Yeah. That’s it.


In which I explode with happiness.

Guess what!? Remember how whiny and pathetic I was on Valentine’s Day about having received a pretty new necklace that I LOVE, yet not being happy with that and going on to demand working bigger and better appliances?

Do not despair. (Cause like, I know you totally are.)

What is THIS?

It’s MINE! That’s what! This is my new crush. He lives in my utility room and deals with all my “dirty laundry”.

Er, no. Actually he deals with my DIRTY LAUNDRY.


Anyway, he is beautiful and shiny, (I will always gravitate towards the shiny.), and he sings to me and gives me chocolate.

With almonds.

I have to admit that it was kind of distressing as well. There he sat, looking so damn sexy and beside him?

It’s like a bucket of cold water thrown over my heated up bod. No. This will never do.

NOT TO MENTION, the damn thing sounds like the clubbing death of 5 or maybe 6 baby seals. You have no idea how badly this beast squeals and shrieks. Even with the door shut to the utility room it is impossible to relax when the dryer was running. I KNOW the neighbors have considered calling the SPCA on us since we are obviously torturing the dogs.

Then, day before yesterday, Sunday, February 20th 2011, my dear friend Lisa’s husband, Roger, delivered me from the bowels of hell. OK, actually he delivered my new dryer, but you get the gist here.


Roger, if Lisa ever leaves you, I will do your laundry. Love ya, man.

HA meets BHE

I have news of great import! OK, maybe not… but it’s at least good news!

First of all, I have been gone to Mither and Pop’s house and just got home on Tuesday. Mither is redoing her kitchen and finds the use of free slave labor, (me), mandatory. I will be going back again here soon. There will be painting of cabinets, new counter tops and we are going to tile the backsplash.

“It” says backsplash isn’t one word. If it’s not it should be, so I am making it one. And you were here to witness it, on this day in history, Saturday, August 21, 2010.

Now, glad that’s all cleared up.

The reason I came home before everything was done, (Aside from the fact that at this point it looks like we will never finish it.), is that for a good long while now, Angie Alley, over at Big Hair Envy, and I have been planning to get together after she and her husband, Scott, were done having their hearts ripped out enrolling and dropping their only child, Snow White, in college at Baylor. Baylor is in Waco, Texas and a mere 4 or so hours away. And after driving to Texas from Virginia, I’m guessing that’s a cake walk. So Angie and Scott made reservations in scenic Galveston and John and I drove down to meet them Thursday night for dinner and drinks. Bless their hearts! It was quite the emotional day for them! I can imagine how exhausted they must have been after going through orientation with Snow White and walking all over campus, moving her into her room and setting her all up, then having to leave her there. In addition to driving for another 4 hours to Galveston.

Meanwhile, I am sitting here at home, unable to contain myself.

I was so excited I could hardly stand it!

Yet, I did not pee myself!

Angie and Scott Alley

We met up with Angie and Scott at their hotel and proceeded to hug and “SQUEEEE!”, and all that happy crap.

*Disclaimer* OK, at this point I will be required by John and I think I can safely say, Scott, to tell you that they did not hug each other or “SQUEEE!”.

Whatev. They did the manly-man thing with the handshakes and then talked a lot of sports.

I think.

Angie and I were so busy chatting I didn’t really pay much attention to what they were saying.

We exchanged gifts, except there wasn’t an exchange. Wait. That doesn’t make sense… Right. You were expecting that.

Angie produced a gift bag with two Blogfest Tervis Tumblers from 2009 and 2010 for me that I am more proud of than you can imagine.

Blog Fest Tumblers

Blog Fest Tumblers

Also, my very own bag of Fiddler Crab Crap that the wondrous Noe Noe Girl made for all the 2010 attendees.

My life is now complete. The huge gaping hole that I thought could only be filled with shit like love and self respect is now gone and I can rest easy knowing I have Fiddler Crab Crap!  I am pretty sure the only way to get yours is to attend Blog Fest 2011! I am just incredibly fortunate in that I met Angie.


Fiddler Crab Crap

The really sad/bad part is that after all the waiting, all the excitement about seeing them, all the time I had to prepare, I went off and forgot the items I had gotten them at my house!

When I returned home I immediately took pictures of these and sent to Angie on  her phone. I will get them off in the mail to her ASAP!

Please forgive the placement of the pictures in this post. I have fooled around with this damn thing for hours trying to get the damn pics and the damn words to go in the right damn places. Every time I hit save it reverts back to a damn mess.

I hate WordPress.

Glasses for Angie and Scott

Apparently I can only type in italics now…. *sigh* Have I mentioned how much I detest WordPress?

Anyway! I was about to tell you about the most valuable pic I took! The one of The Mysterious Buzzard Bucket.

The Mysterious Buzzard Bucket

I am bound by promises and secrets, but I can tell you this much:

  • It IS mysterious.
  • It was given to Angie by Grandma J.
  • It contains…. something mysterious.
  • If you want to see it in person I am sure it will be at Blog Fest 2011.
  • Why is it that when I choose to do bullet points THE DAMN THING REVERTS BACK TO NON ITALIC TYPE?
  • Damn.

Now! I get my regular old type back! All I had to do was bullet points to get it! Something useful to know with WORDPRESS!