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Archive for the ‘ Rants ’ Category


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Hello, people.  Greetings to all!  I have had company today and they FINALLY left, not a moment too soon!  My SIL came and brought her son, his…girlfriend and their two children to see Henrietta.  Every time she brings these people they break something big.  The last time they were here the…girlfriend-in-law climbed up on the trampoline with her little boy when she was EIGHT MONTHS PREGNANT, and the rusted out frame gave way and it is a thousand wonders little miss dumb ass didn’t give birth right there.  I was inside and didn’t witness the dumb ass wonders taking place in the backyard, otherwise she would have never gotten up there.  You just kinda of assume that not only is she old enough to watch her own children she can make responsible decisions for herself.  Or, at least I did.  Never again, though.

This time the 3 year old hellion that was on the trampoline with his mom last time was running all over the house and being an Unholy Terror.  He went outside with his dad to get something out of the car and ran back to the door ahead of his dad and struck the leaded glass panel with his hands and broke a good sized hole out of the bottom of it.

PLUS, I found out some things about their finances while they were here that really chapped me arse.  I know, I know, what business is it of mine?  Plenty, it turns out.  SIL is forever going on about how poor ____ and _______ are so broke and need money so bad and they need groceries and can we spare some money to help them out?  So I usually fork over a check for $35.00 or $40.00.  Well, SIL said something about how you can get online on her son’s TV set.  I looked at him and said, “Oh?  How do you do that?  Special kind of TV?”  No, it’s with his PlayStation 3.  “Oh, I didn’t know PlayStation 3’s could get online…”  No, not all of them, just a special kind.  “Oh, wow.  How much are they?”  Five hundred dollars.

The little shit can afford to buy the most expensive games out there, yet, apparently, has some difficultly providing for his ever increasing family.  No longer my worry.  The well has dried completely up.  Next time SIL tells me they are near death and starvation, I will tell her to suggest to them hocking the PS3.

Mark My Words inter-tubes, no more free rides for these jokers and I may even cut off my family…er, no, before I could finish this sentence Keelan called and wants to borrow $10.00 to go to the movie.  But, ya know what?  She’ll pay me back,  Without me having to ask for it!

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In…more upbeat news, I have a new blog award!  My brother, Cam, bestowed it on me and while the cute little hiney on the award doesn’t look anything like H’s little shriveled up butt, I appreciate it, none the less.  Actually, I appreciate the fact that it doesn’t look like her at all.  He pinched the pic from this post of Big Hair Envy’s.

In appreciation of this cute little hiney, and because of the many diapers changed while dealing with all other manner of shit, I would like for Angie to have the first Loaded Diaper Award.  Congratulations, Angie!

A Smorgasbord


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Hello intertubes!  I am back with a quick update!

Nothing too spectacular has happened since the last time I announced the goings on here at the Nut House.  How bouts a quickie update?  Too bad, here it is:

  • John was off yesterday and we ran amuck.  The caregiver provider stayed here with H and we were muckyrunning aaaaall over the place.  For gasoline to be so freakin’ expensive, we were WILD!  heh heh.  We made it to Macy’s to see if there were any good deals to be had and sure enough, John’s ultra sensitive nose for economical spending steered us to a few new ties for him.  His butt cheeks made a squeaking noise as we walked over to where the tie sale rack sits.  He is always needing new neck-wear, as he isn’t that easy on his ties.  We got three $45.00 Donald Trump ties for just $5.63 a piece.  He wore one of them today, but here are the other two.



They look a little pink here.  Actually they are dark red.



Here is the proof!  With tax, $18.28 for three Donald Trump ties.

The trick at Macy’s is to find the stuff that’s on sale and take it over to the price checker thing and start scanning anything that you are remotely interested in because they are really good/bad about either mispricing or just not putting correct signage out for the sale products.  And the prices are SO good that I think they are probably just making mistakes when they are pricing, but it works out great for us almost every time we go.  My sweet little miser husband pulled out his dusty, cobweb covered wallet and paid $18.28 for all three.  Good deal!

  • Hurricane Dolly made landfall sometime yesterday evening, I think, and we finally started getting some much needed rain from it.  It is still raining off and on.  Woo-Hoo!
  • My brother in Italy isn’t.  In Italy, that is.  He arrived last night at my parents house in Decatur, Tx and I am hoping we will be able to meet up with all of them on Wednesday for a visit.
  • Henrietta is still catheter-free and letting her hoo-hoo rest.   I asked her how it was getting on and she pulled a super serious face and replied, “Oh, it’s doing very well, thank you!”, and then burst out laughing.  Last nigh she asked me if I would close the blinds for her in her room and I said sure and was doing so and she said, “Now make sure they’re closed up tight…”.  and I said I thought they were and no one could see in that little slit, and she replied, ” I might be able to get out through there, tho…”.   I said, “You?” To which she looked sly and said, “Krissa, I don’t have any bag to hold me back, now!  You don’t know what I might do!”
  • Be on the lookout for a catheter free little old lady in a nightgown.
  • I just totally told off a lady who called here from Dell Computers asking me if the problem we were having last Sunday was resolved.  I told her no, we still haven’t been able to get it to recognize the disc drive.  She said something like, “Oh.”, and immediately changed the subject a bit by asking me how it was doing otherwise.  I told her, “Actually it’s running slow.  My husband and I were discussing it last night and he and I have both tried all the little tricks that used to make a difference in the past with no luck.”  (Keep in mind that it’s a year old next month.  In other words, THE WARRANTY IS ABOUT TO EXPIRE AND NO MORE “FREE” TECH SUPPORT)  She came back with, “Well, I see here you bought it with only 2GB of memory and that really isn’t enough to support Vista.”

This is where I got ticked off.

“No.  It supports Vista just fine and has for almost a year now.  It only started running slow just lately.”

She proceeded to tell me that if I ever wanted to get it to run well again I needed to purchase some RAM from her.  Now.  On the phone.  Or forever be delegated to computer hell.

“No one told me it was insufficient to support Vista when I bought it.”  She comes back with a snappy, “Oh, uh, well?”

I told her no thank you we’re not sinking any more money into it because we’re getting an Apple.

That got her off the line.  She was originally calling to sell me another warranty.

  • I am taking this opportunity to apologize for the lack of substance in this post.  THAT is the state of my life, lately.  Substance free…and applesauce free.

I'm back…but is it a good thing?


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Hello, people!  It’s been a while!  I am happy to report that I am still alive, only just barely it seems.  I am having a hard time shaking this funk I’m in and it really makes it hard to post.  Ideas that seem good to me late at night while watching Ferguson or trying to go to sleep, seem ridiculous the next day.  I am being a little depressed and my mind doesn’t want to work fast or freely anymore, just like the rest of me, I suppose!  Haha.

John was only off one day this week and it was yesterday.  We frantically ran around for three hours while the caregiver provider person was here and managed to take in lunch at a nearby Chinese restaurant, which I felt like was splurging because everything is so expensive now.  And I don’t just mean at the Chinese Restaurant, I mean everything.  At this point I am thinking the only way we can help pay for college is if we rent out the daughter in servitude.  I know what you’re thinking.  If she is in servitude, how will she go to school that is getting paid for?  Vicious circle.  I guess we could sell the younger daughter into servitude and she could support her sister’s need for knowledge, but I am thinking that would create a good deal of resentment and bitterness.  Just guessing.

That leaves us with Henrietta and I just can’t see anyone paying me for taking her off my hands.  Correct me if you know something I don’t.

I was soooo gonna do a post on Wednesday.  Things stewing around in my little head, fingers itching to type them out… whatev.  H. woke up that morning distressed that she was having stomach cramps, “all night”.

me: Why didn’t you ring the bell?

H: Oh, I didn’t want to bother you!

me: (teasing) Well, when you need to use the potty you have to tell me.  I can’t read your mind….!

H: (Smiling) Oh I don’t want to bother you at night, Krissa.

So all this happened BEFORE breakfast.  This is important because it is an UNSCHEDULED POOP, or a “U.P.”  This set the tone for the day.  She ate half her oatmeal very slowly and did the characteristic whiny and sing-song voice.  I knew she wouldn’t eat all of her food just because that is what she automatically does if anything is amiss in her life.  Unscheduled Poo, hangnail, cramp in her calf, cold chill while getting a bed-bath, coughing due to allergies/sinus drainage, whatever.  But, when I brought her the egg and little piece of sausage with a roll and jelly she, ate everything but about a bite and a half of the egg and a little tiny piece of the bread.  It’s like she was thinking, “I have to leave something on the plate, I’m sick!”

So when I picked up the tray and saw she hadn’t finished everything I knew it was going to be a day of pitifullness and staying in bed.  Which really does suit me fine.  She discovered other problems during the day and had a bout with indigestion and we did Malox and Sprite and a teaspoon of baking soda in water and everything we could think of, I don’t know how bad it really was, she was teary eyed all day and acting ready to cash in her chips cause he couldn’t burp.

Thursday she decided she needed to stay in bed because, “Maybe I had better just stay here… you know, to make sure.”  Make sure of what, I have no idea.  Make sure she can burp?  Make sure she only poops between the hours of 1:00 and 2:00PM?  Make sure I can still run up and down that long ass hall, (and getting longer all the time), 400 times a day?  Make sure the clapper on the cowbell she rings isn’t worn out from the day before?  These are questions I now wish I’d asked her.

So that’s it people.  That’s all I got.  Sorry I don’t feel the least bit like trying to produce anything remotely amusing.  I am hoping this will eventually pass.  I am sure it will.

Strange, extended


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Has anyone noticed anything new about my blog?  Anything missing, or not in place?  Aside from the moving of some buttons and the addition of MeMarieLane’s button?  Nothing?  Not like two missing posts?

I present to you exhibit A.  The younger child, (known for reasons soon to become obvious as “Positively Insistent Sarcastic Sister And Not Thoughtful”, or PISSANT), took it upon herself to rectify a situation that she disapproved of.  She, apparently read my post about her behavior and decided to delete it.  I have the computer set up so that when I open up any of the things that I need there are no passwords or locked doors, or secret handshakes to get in.  It’s my computer, (my loving husband would probably like for me to point out that it is also his and he can use it anytime he wants…well, when I’m not on it…), and I don’t see any reason to have to go through a gauntlet of crap to get to where I’m going.  So, really no secrets there.  She did not like me saying anything negative about her and I guess, in retrospect, I can see how it might be disturbing and if I had to do it over again I might not have left it where she could read it structured my sentences in such an unflattering light, HOWEVER, I am not talking to her friends, or anyone she is likely to ever even meet.  PISSANT, on the other hand, blasts me out of the water every time we have a fight verbal altercation to all her pals on her MySpace page who come over to the house.  I am face to face to these kids who, no doubt, believe I breathe fire.  On her.

The really weird thing is that when I found out she had done it, I wasn’t just mad.  I was devastated. I felt so totally betrayed and violated.  I’s so weird, I had no idea this meant so very much to me.  And she had left some comments on the posts before she erased them that I removed, (edit, edit, edit), that said things to the effect that I should not be “talking shit” about her and it’s stupid for me to be so worried about her giving money to her friends and at least she HAS friends and not just pretend friends on line.  Yes, she used those words.  Made me furious.

I calmed down a bit and told John who is a soft shoe with the kids, but was alarmed that she had done it and said he was going to talk to her about it.  I crossed her path in the living room when she came in and stopped her and told her “Do not ever read, comment, or touch my blog in any way, shape or form again.  I don’t go snooping around on your MySpace and have fits about what you write about me.”  PISSANT didn’t say anything and I think, for one brief moment we had a meeting of the minds.  She did look contrite, so maybe she got it.  I think she did.

I talked to Cam, (brother dearest), and he pointed out that friends are people you care about and talk to and get and give advice to, so if my blog buddies aren’t my friends, who is?  Good point, Cam.

Now, that is out of my system and she can go back to being My Darling Keelan.  However I am going to have a hard time making a good accronym out of MDK.


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I can’t get the song Snowbird, by Anne Murray out of my head.  Been singing this in my little head for a couple of days.  WHY?

Yesterday Keelan spent nearly $300.00 of her hard earned(?) money on an iPod Touch, and an iTunes Music Card.  I think she slept with it last night, and she won’t let anyone else touch it.  Not even me.

Twitter is not working.  I don’t know what to do…What am I if not a Twit?

Wonder why those little frozen peanut butter and jelly sandwiches John buys are so much better than ones I make myself?  I told him that buying them was the stupidest thing in the world when you could just make them here, fresh, and it’s at least the same thing.  Then he made me try one of the store bought kind.  Yum!  Weird.

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Tonight I ran out with Kessa when she got home from work to shop for a few things that she’s been needing.  It was nice to get out and we usually have a nice time shopping together.  We do NOW…not always.  Anyway, I was standing in the space outside her cubicle in the dressing rooms and there was a mom and daughter a few doors down from us.  I couldn’t hear exactly what was being said, but it was rather hushed, stressed tones.  In a few moments the mother came out of the dressing room and stalked past me looking at the floor with her hands balled into tight, white, little fists.  She proceeded out to the waiting area with the sofa and chairs.  she turned the corner and stopped.  I could hear almost all of the exchange with the husband/father:

Mother: “I spent $57.00 on shoes and all kinds of other crap for her last week!”

Dad: “mumble, mumble, well, yeah…..I know…Mumble…”

Mom: “I DON’T CARE!  I am sick and tired of her treating me like shit!”

Dad: “Mumble, mumble…voice down…”

Mom: “I AM TELLING YOU, I AM THROUGH BEING AN EFFING DOORMAT FOR HER!  She treats me like shit and I am nothing but someone for her to just use and abuse!”

This went on for a minute or so and I got the feeling the daughter was taking longer than necessary to come out of the dressing room.  She finally emerged and looked up at me as if all the world was her oyster and gave me a kind of polite little smile as she strolled by and I SWEAR IT WAS ALL I COULD DO NOT TO STICK OUT MY FOOT AND TRIP HER AS SHE WALKED BY AND THEN RUN OUT AND TELL HER POOR MOM WHAT I HAD DONE.

This time in their lives?  I remember it soooooo well….  Mine almost didn’t live through it, only they never knew how close to actual death they came.


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