Remember waaaaay back when I was having all sorts of problems with my website having nasty pop ups announcing that you now have herpes for reading me? Remember that?

Sure you do. You’re just in denial. But don’t worry about it cause I am here to remind you!

Good times!

Anyway, right after my blog caught an STD and I thought it was fixed, but before it was actually fixed, (and I went on to shed tears and pull out hair and converse with my brother, Cam, a.k.a. Pooter Guru, and he worked on it for ages and then turned it over to his buddy Shawn who fixed it! Cause he’s a freakin’ genius!) Anyway, yeah… after that, but before that? I posted about a contest in which I was searching for a story for my new/temporary header, since my old, personalized, swank one had gone the way of the mastodons.

I felt terrible when I realized that the virus was still there after I posted about the contest and readership fell off a great deal, due to the fact that no one wanted to touch my syphilitic site with a ten foot pole.

I can’t blame them either. I didn’t post a new post for a long time. Meanwhile it was really, really getting fixed.

However there were a few steadfast readers that wished to take their chances with a sure and certain instant death and enter my bloggy contest. After all, the prizes and shiz were really… well, they weren’t really all THAT, but then I have some readers of questionable taste. 😉

HI! LOVE YOU GUYS!

Anyway, the plague struck my blog and then it was fixed and then Henrietta was in the process of dying and then she did die and that whole episode of life was a vast desert of nothing but missing time. I feel like I don’t even remember any of it, now. Like a bad dream.

Well, that’s how the contest got derailed. But now it’s back on!

Here is a pic of the booty.

Contest Booty

Now, just gaze at my header and dream up a really good story for the scene. I mean at first glance it appears to be a man walking down a rustic lane with sheep grazing peacefully in the pasture next to him. But… where is he going? Where has he been? Who did he see? Did they argue? Was it a huge fight?! Is there a dead body somewhere? Are those sheep vaccinated!?

Just run with it.

I will decide the winner and ship all this crapola, (I’m pretty sure that’s a Messican word.), right to your doorstep for you to open just like on a birthday and “Oooo” and “Aaaaah” over. You will be awed by the love, care and colored tissue paper my very own hands have packed it with.

I may even spray my favorite scent on the whole shebang.

PLUS, as I indicated in the previous posts here and here and here and here and here, (OK, not really but I’m trying to make it sound like I’ve been up to this for a good while.), you can use the contest as blog fodder and all the thousands of people who read your site will then click on your link over to me!

Am I am maniacal genius or WHAT? I will post all links to your, (my faithful readers- both of you) sites and all the millions of people who troll through faithfully and read every word I have ever written will link back to you as well!

I really should just run the damn world.

Here are the links to the blogs that have already entered! Go and read them! Jean over at Working Momma 247 and Red Hamster over at In the Wheel! Really some good stuff!

Now. Go and read the Official Rules and Regulations as set forth by the gaming committee.