Hello my darlings! And how is every little thing today? Me? I am doing very well, thank you.
As a matter of fact, I am free to say I am finally doing very well. I have had a horrible few weeks and, apparently, my little head is up for air. I am having a horrible time with depression and hot flashes AT THE SAME TIME.
Just kill me now, thank you.
I am taking over the counter, all natural, hormone help things that, actually, I have been on for a good long while and they work great. It’s that Estroven stuff, but I was doing the Walmart brand of it cause it’s the same exact thing and cheaper.
Aaaaanyway, all of the sudden, the shit wern’t working s’good. If that sounded like redneck disappointment, it was and that is exactly what I turn into when battling hot flashes one after another, while wanting to choke everyone I come in contact with.
The nice, well spoken, southern lady disappears and Red Neck Krissa takes her place. I have been told all about how it manifests itself and appears to others.
It, truly is terrifying.
Well, this has been going on for a few weeks at least, with some days being much better/worse than others and John grabbed the phone and made an appointment for me with a doctor of some such for Monday. A witch doctor? Maybe.
That’s two days away. And yet my optimistic family thinks that we will all be here and alive by Monday.
The fools.
OK, getting back to the hot flashes, and disregarding the fact that I have a bad case of ADD as well as everything else, the Estroblend had all of the sudden stopped working and I wanted the Super strength one I had seen on the shelf there with it some time before.
I WANTED IT NOW.
We went to get it and I discovered the night time one as well and got that too, cause if I am ever going to abuse pills, I want it to be now sooooo bad.
No, I talked to the pharmacist at Target, where we were, and she studied the boxes and assured me I could take the extra strength AND the night time ones, both. I started eating the extra strength there, in the store.
I MAY have noticed a slight decrease in hot flashes already, but really, it’s just not happening soon enough to suit me. Really, if I have to be completely honest, nothing is happening soon enough to suit me. I be cranky.
And then? I got the opportunity to spend the day with my daughter.
Yesterday Kessa and I spent the whole day together and had a wonderful time. We got out to see the matinee of Letters to Juliet. It really was a good movie and while there were some very predictable scenes in it, at least I couldn’t assume the dialog. I truly hate going to movies and knowing almost exactly what the characters are going to say next.
It was fresh charming and amusing and Kes and I both gave it two thumbs up.
I had three hot flashes during it where I had to lean forward away from the back of my seat and fan my blouse. I almost asked Kessa to blow down the back of it, but she’s really weird about drawing lines about what she’ll do in public, so I didn’t even bother. Besides, it makes her cranky for me to ask her to do something like that and if we’re both cranky at the same time- well, I’m pretty sure that’s how world wars get started. Or maybe just shower mold.
Whatever. It’s bad.
We then headed out to Old Navy and were not the least bit surprised to find that the things that were in the sale circular that we were interested in were all gone. That store is very bad about not stocking up on things that they run ads on. I suspect poor management. So we purchased nothing and moved on to World Market right next door.
Oh, joy! I do loves me some World Market! And Kes is beginning to appreciate the uniqueness of it as well.
We bought this and this (tortellini stuffed with cheese and vodka pasta sauce in case you’re like me and sometimes hate to click on things in posts), and some basil tomato cheese that I can’t find on the website.
Anyway, we brought it home and cooked it all and topped with the fresh basil from the back yard and grated the cheese over it and consumed vast quantities of pesto on Italian bread with melted mozzarella on it.
It was good.
But we also went to the mall and I went into the Apple store with the express intentions of playing with an ipad. It was fun and Kes got on one too and we did all kinds of crazy things. But, sadly, they were too busy to notice us and didn’t even kick us out. No offense to Kessa, but I think I needed Lisa with me to accomplish this.
Come to think of it, Lisa would have stood up in the middle of the theater and fanned me with an empty popcorn bucket, had I needed it. I DID. Heh. Good ol’ Lisa.
I then popped into Coldwater Creek and shopped a bit with my birthday gift certificate burning a hole in my purse, but just didn’t feel like buying anything right then. So we moved on. Next we left the mall and went to Kohl’s where we made the rounds and came away with nothing of import. BUT, we had fun together and it was really, really relaxing.
I feel like I have needed that for a long time. Thanks, Kes. I love you.
Now, I know I have been rather absentee for a good while. Only posting enough to keep people from sending the cops to my door to see if I’m still alive and hardly keeping up with reading and commenting at all. But, I have felt like shit and really? Do you want to see anything I have to say if I’m crying incoherently while pecking away on the keyboard?
I thought not. (Wise choice.)
I have been seriously toying with a goodbye post and just kind of go back and forth. For right now, I am just planing on going to the witch doctor on Monday. Let’s see where that gets me, huh? Maybe I will be a better blogger in addition to feeling like a better person. 😉
15 comments
Comment by Jean M. on May 15, 2010 at 5:46 pm
I need some pep me up pills too…not so much for the hot flashes yet. I’m not ready to go there yet. I do hope you get to feeling better soon, it’s been a crazy last few months for you. I had to snicker at “shower mold” hehe hehe
.-= Jean M.´s last blog ..Because it’s Saturday and gloomy… =-.
Comment by Nan on May 16, 2010 at 6:07 am
Oh, don’t say goodbye yet! We neeeed each other! I think you’ve been through a lot lately, and you’ll feel better soon. Sending good vibes!
.-= Nan´s last blog ..It’s A Mad, Mad Week… =-.
Comment by Chief on May 16, 2010 at 1:18 pm
(((hugs)))
listen, there is no need for a goodbye post.. just keep doing what you’re doing and we will all be here when you post.
Its been a rough time over at your household! Blogging needn’t be an obligation. Do it when you want!
.-= Chief´s last blog ..Misson Monkey and Not your Average Teen =-.
Comment by Mary on May 16, 2010 at 1:50 pm
Oh my! All I can say is that it does get better and if you can keep from killing yourself or someone else, you’ll come out the other end feeling more normal again. Really! You will! I took plant based hormones for a couple of years when I started wanting to cry or strangle someone at the same time. It helped. Don’t go away- you need support from WWK- “we who know”. And we need you as you “stand up and show your soul” (Clarissa Pinkola Estes) which she calls both brave and necessary. You’re not alone.
.-= Mary´s last blog ..First Two-piece Swimsuit =-.
Comment by Karen on May 16, 2010 at 2:07 pm
I hope you get the help you need, and stay with blogging. I’d miss you, girl!
Comment by Lisa on May 16, 2010 at 3:29 pm
I would have fanned you and even more I would have handed you the old fashioned fold out fan I keep in my purse for my hot flashes!!!! Boy does it help. I have no in public rules……..lol
Keep your doc appt!!!!!! Luv Luv
Comment by Kori on May 17, 2010 at 3:02 pm
To hell with being a better blogger; do whatever you need to do to be happy, ya know?
Comment by Hyphen Mama on May 18, 2010 at 1:02 pm
Seriously Krissa, ME TOO, (okay, not the fun movie and shopping trip with my daughter part) but the BAD ASS MOODS AND GOING TO CHOKE SOMEBODY VERY SOON part… totally ME TOO. I’ve upped my progesterone but it doesn’t seem to be working FAST ENOUGH. And that’s a lot of why I haven’t been blogging lately either. I hope your witch doctor has some fantastic answers for you!!!!
.-= Hyphen Mama´s last blog ..Is it really one month until summer vacation? =-.
Comment by Red Hamster on May 18, 2010 at 2:09 pm
I’ve been way too busy at work and nearly dead by the time I get home, to read blogs, but you are tops on my list. And you are still a Southern lady, cause we have been saying the same thing for weeks “Just kill me now, thank you.”, but at least you add a “thank you”. I usually add a few swear words.
Wish I lived closer to my daughters. Bless Kes for spending a whole day with her ol’ hot flash mom. A day with your daughter(s) is always a good tonic.
How did the Monday doc visit go? Hugs, hope you’re feeling better.
Comment by Bruce on May 19, 2010 at 10:00 am
Oh my! All I can say is that it does get better and if you can keep from killing yourself or someone else, you’ll come out the other end feeling more normal again. Really! You will! I took plant based hormones for a couple of years when I started wanting to cry or strangle someone at the same time. It helped. Don’t go away- you need support from WWK- “we who know”. And we need you as you “stand up and show your soul” (Clarissa Pinkola Estes) which she calls both brave and necessary. You’re not alone.
.-= Mary´s last blog ..First Two-piece Swimsuit =-.
Comment by grandma j on May 24, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I’m not sure they have pills for what ails me. I feel your pain about the hot flashes. I lost most of my best friends and two husbands because of them….sort of.
.-= grandma j´s last blog .. =-.
Comment by JennyMac on May 26, 2010 at 8:58 am
Sending positive thoughts that you feel much better soon and find something that works for you Krissa.
.-= JennyMac´s last blog ..My husband might be hiring =-.
Comment by Kelley @ Magnetoboldtoo on June 3, 2010 at 12:26 am
Don’t say goodbye, just walk away and take a breath. That way you have the opportunity to come back without looking like a twit.
And start carrying around one of those ye olde fashioned fans. And say ‘Oh my LANDS!’ a lot.
That would crack me up.
.-= Kelley @ Magnetoboldtoo´s last blog ..Tight muscles. Craptacular crafters. Chipmonks must die. Naked male models serving breakfast. =-.
Comment by noe noe girl on June 8, 2010 at 2:05 pm
I know all too freeking well about those hot flashes! I finally went to the Dr and he put me on Prempro just in the nick of time. I was on the verge of putting everyone in my house out of my misery! It has been a wonder drug for me! Now if I could just find out what to do about this shingle pain. Gah getting old sucks!
Comment by grandma j on June 12, 2010 at 12:30 pm
Krissa, take you meds, take a nap…..have some wine then let us know you are OK!!
Smooches and hugs
.-= grandma j´s last blog .. =-.
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