Hello again, people.
A few days ago Keelan was sitting in living room on the couch reading her book I was talking to Henrietta about something and I forget what we were discussing but it became necessary for me to use the word Fritos. Well, let me preface this by explaining that the only thing worse than H’s hearing is her comprehension. Her little mind races and she… tries too hard(?) and over thinks what you are saying and totally gets the words screwed up. It’s like playing Password with a hyper, narcissistic, mental patient.
Anyway, as I was saying, I don’t remember what we were talking about but I used the word “Fritos”. Only when I said it to H it was broken into two distinct syllables and enunciated very clearly. FREE TOES! (Imagine me shouting into her ear…) Well, Keelan tried to die. First I heard her snort and then she said, “Did I just hear you say ‘free toes’?” and she was gone. Dissolved into a fit of giggles that wouldn’t stop.
Did not matter how hard I tried to explain to her why I had said it that way, she would. not. stop. laughing.
I finally just said “OK! I’m from Texas AND SO ARE YOU! Is it really so hard to figure out why I went “there” with the word?”
Now every time I want to make her smile, I just say “Free toes”. And sometimes I text her, “Free toes”.
John is going to be on vacation next week, starting tomorrow and we have a list of things to do. (oh yea) He is going to need some time to recuperate from the hurricane schedule they have had to adhere to at work and truly I feel for him about this because I know he is truly tired.
But here’s the list anyway:
*Caulk the shingles
*Change phone companies
*Compare insurance rates, USAA and Allstate
*Make a new financial plan
*Track down and attack the person in charge of getting Medicare to give H a new wheelchair.
And this is just the beginning.
Thursday “they” came by and picked up all the brush piled on our curb since the hurricane. Things are beginning to look a bit more normal around here. At least our street is. Except for all the sawed off trees and huge holes in the ground where they just pulled up, root ball and all.
I called Housecall Doctors today and asked them to tell me how the x-ray came out that they did on H on Thursday. The Dr on call called me back and told me that, (surprise, surprise), she has a dislocated hip. I said I already knew that and explained the problem to him and told him her history and what I was worried about.
He told me to take her to see a orthopedist.
This lady is an orthopedist’s wet dream. I wonder where he’ll start? I figure that’s one of the things that will go on John’s vacation list after I talk to Darnell, her PA.
Well, I really need to toss this post up and see what happens. Will the pooter spit it back out? It should.
Free Toes, everybody!
Comment by witchypoo on October 5, 2008 at 7:22 am
Free toes! Almost has the ring of shit mittens.
Comment by Tink on October 6, 2008 at 10:07 am
Free toes! Where? I need some for the toe jam I’m making for our cannibal kitchen this Halloween. 😉
Comment by Colleen on October 6, 2008 at 11:33 am
Free Toes right back at’cha, lady!
That’s going right up there with “Do your rips leach?” from our family…born from when I slept on the top bunk and was trying to kiss my dad goodnight. One of us asked the other “do your rips leach?”
Comment by Big Hair Envy on October 6, 2008 at 12:02 pm
I’ll never be able to eat Fritos again……all I will think of is “Free Toes”…with a Texas accent!
I’m impressed that you were able to use “Free Toes”, financial plan, caulk and “Wet Dream” in the same post. You have a gift 🙂
Comment by Karen on October 6, 2008 at 7:27 pm
I’m just shaking my head. What is there to say after a post like this?
Comment by Serendipitous Girl on October 7, 2008 at 10:22 pm
You are too cute and AGAIN you crack me up–I’m with BHE, GENIUS use of the caulk and wet dream ; )
Comment by Annette on October 8, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Krissa, you have a keen sense of humor and I have enjoyed reading your blogs….how can you take the dull and mundane events of life and actually make them funny! Free toes right back at ya, Babe!
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