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The electricity went out for a bit tonight and we all found ourselves outside with the neighbors. Everyone came over and re-introduced themselves to H. The general attitude is that she is so incredibly old she MUST not remember who anyone is. Sometimes she doesn’t. They are all just being very nice, and I know it. Anyway, she kept saying how hot it is and seemed amazed that you could “feel the heat rising up…”. Keep in mind that she is extremely agoraphobic. It is very hard to get her to go outside the door, either front or back. I bet it has been three months since she has left the house. But with no light or TV she really had very little choice.
Keelan was showing me a message she got from someone on her Myspace page and telling me what she was saying back to him. She is kinda excited about this kid and hasn’t seen him since school was out. So she is telling me what she is typing and she said, “…and a smiley face. You know about that don’t you? Smiley faces? You know, semi-colon for a wink and then close parentheses?” I thought I was being uber cool and said, “Smiley faces? Yeah…been around since the dawn of the typewriter. Only you forgot the dash for a nose.” She had the audacity to just bust out laughing hysterically and tell me that I am soooo old and ‘out of it’, “NOBODY puts a nose, Mom!”
How do they take the tiniest things and try to make you feel so stupid with them? Lucky for me, I have rino-hide and it is impossible at this point.
Henrietta did a poo in the bedpan earlier and I took it over to the cedar chest to set it down by the door to be taken out in a minute to dump in the potty, while I put the diaper on her. However, this time when I set the bedpan down there was so much crap in the way on the cedar chest it didn’t get completely on there and fell off, The poo is quite soft and a bit runny and it…splattered out and hit my thong clad foot. Besides being extremely grossed out I was immediately furious with all of her relatives who keep bringing her STUFFED ANIMALS. They are all over the place now and there is little room for anything else. Her room has gone from being a lovely haven to looking like a nursery. WHY do people think children’s toys are good to give to old people? I mean when they clearly don’t have the minds of children. They don’t play with dolls, don’t throw balls, don’t play make believe in any form, shape or manner. She won’t let go of any of it, either, because it was given to her. Spoken just like someone raised in the depression era.
Anyway, I did some rearranging and made enough room on the cedar chest to sit the bedpan while I finish up with the diaper and dressing and whatnot. But, the next time the people in her family that show up, (about twice a year, they come to visit), and bring something ridiculous to her I am seriously considering saying something like, “Oh! A child’s bear?” OH!, for Henrietta! Well, I don’t know how much she’ll play with it, but it’s really cute….” Would I be a horrible person?
Yes. I would.
I just saw a Twitter from Ree over at Hotfessional that reminded me of a conference call that I sat in on with John, Tuesday on his day off. On of his buddies he used to work for called him and told him he might want to get in on it just because it was a pretty big deal. The grocery store chain he works for was recalling ALL the ground meat that wasn’t sold in prepackaged tubes. THREE DAYS BEFORE JULY 4th.
So I sat there and listened to all these different speakers talk about exactly what was being recalled and what wasn’t and how to handle it and sanitize the meat cases, coolers, floors, walls, ceilings, armpits, what have you. These people aren’t fooling around. Then there was endless questions from people that had to be the STUPIDEST people I can imagine knowing how to form a question. “Err, yeah, this is Bob Schmob over at store 998. When we sanitize the coolers and the knives, and the grinder and the blades and the prep tables and sink do we also clean the counter tops where the meat is cut up?” Yes, you dumbass. You clean everything the meat has ever touched in the history of the store.
I don’t know how many times this particular kind of question was asked and how many times the, either incredibly patient, or unbelievably stupid upper management people would once again tell them that, yes, they needed to clean and sanitize everything.
After the conference call had gone on for 65 minutes it ended and would you believe NO ONE EVER SAID WHAT THE PROBLEM WITH THE MEAT WAS. I mean, you can guess it is probably e coli, but, for gawd’s sake, it seems like the managment yo-yo’s would have used the word ONCE. Or someone would have asked. No. Of course it was on the recall site on the internet and it IS e coli, but I think it is PRETTY funny that the corporate big wigs can talk on and on for over an hour and not ever come out and say what the problem actually IS! Typical. At least for this company.
Earlier tonight I came in here and Keelan was on the computer doing, Gawd knows what. I sat and waited for a bit and watched her and my eyes have gotten so bad that I could have sworn she typed “racial farts” into the googlie search thing. No. It was Rascal Flatts. Do I need to get my eyes checked out?