So far today, John has gone to work and he has a “close” shift, which is ironic because his store is open 24 hours. To “close” just means work the late shift. He goes in at 1:00 and will get off about 11:00 or midnight.
Gil, who is Kes’ boyfriend is upstairs with her and they are watching some creepy movie. I will never understand their fascination with horror flicks. But, hey, if they enjoy it…
H is, (true to life), on the shitter. So I am in a holding pattern until I hear the cowbell ring and then I am off to ahem, clean up her nether regions and get her dressed if she wants to get up by then. It is currently almost 3:00pm so, she may not want to get up today. She’s been obsessing all day about all the coughing she did last night. I have tried over and over to tell her that it’s just her allergies and her sinuses are draining. This tickles her throat and she coughs. No. She is having none of it. She announced that “I have a fever in my stomach because I keep drinking water.” Well, if ever there has been a good reason to invent some mysterious, abeit impossible malady I say drinking water should be it. I have an ingrown hair on my leg and I’m sure that that’s why I’m thirsty right now. Hey, at least an ingrown hair is possible. Fever in her stomach? What kind of old Mexican wives tale is that? Better yet, how on earth do they justify it? Someone swallow a thermometer and barf it back up after 3 minutes to prove it?
Ya just gotta wonder where this stuff comes from and why anyone would buy it.
Comment by Tink on May 24, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Swallowing a thermometer would take an awful lot of peanut butter to muster. And then getting it back out would be another feat altogether. 😉
Comment by Tranny Head on May 24, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Dude – that’s some crazy stuff. What do old lady nether regions look like, anyway? Maybe I don’t want to know – alas, I’ll know all too soon. *hangs head in shame*
Comment by Krissa on May 24, 2008 at 10:08 pm
OH THANK GOD WE ALL, (women in general), AREN’T ABLE TO EASILY SEE OUR “NETHER REGIONS”. I mean, I just don’t think that’s a pretty sight, anyway. Come to think of it, neither is a man’s. And, more specifically, old lady neither regions aren’t either. I get a close up look every day, at least twice, so I speak from experience.
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