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Actual copy of real, authentic, genuine excuse note written for teenage girl with huge, swollen face:

4/22/08

Dear Physical Fitness people,

Keelan had 4 wisdom teeth removed and is still feeling the effects.

While you may feel free to tease her about looking like a chipmunk, please dismiss her from participation in any exerting exercise at this time.

Sincerely,

Krissa Lopez